tonight

so i'm sitting here. in bed. on my iphone.
poking when i should be sleeping.
and all i can think about
(besides how sleepy i am gonna be when i roll out of bed tomorrow morning)
is how insane my life is...
and how cool and humbling it is that my day can consist of seeing really sick people, talking them through their fears, holding their hand as they go under anesthesia, and then cutting these people open and sewing them back up.

even cooler is how i then get to go to the place where my people are...
and how i am reminded of how far i've come,
and how these people and this place help me feel complete and safe.

i am really glad i was invited out tonight.
it felt great.
it made my day feel whole.
and good.

so... now i'll get my sad little 4 hours of sleep,
and it will be worth it to be a little tired tomorrow,
because it was a good night and i am pretty lucky to have all that i have,
and whatever i think i need is irrelevant because
i am happy and whole and good.