Saturday, September 24, 2011

♥ Maui ♥

a few days ago i returned from the most amazing trip i have ever taken in my whole entire life.
i went to Maui with Erek and it is hard to describe how incredible it was.
i feel as though words can't do it justice.
we shared experiences that i am certain were one of a kind,
and for lack of a better (and less cheesy) way of saying it,
it was Magical.

we swam in waterfalls.
we hiked through rain forests.
we drank sugar cane juice and ate coconuts.
we walked on black sand beaches.
we climbed on volcanic rocks.
we ventured into a lava tube.
we watched the sunrise from beneath the clouds at the top of the island.
we snorkeled in clear blue water off the coast of a volcanic crater.
we saw a dolphins and a sea turtle.
we saw a sky full of stars.
we held each other in the pouring rain.

the beauty and peace we found on this trip was awesome.
(like for real... it inspired awe. seriously.)
it felt like it wasn't truly real... it was almost too perfect and too lovely.
but as unbelievable as it was, it really happened.
and i am so glad it did.

this is the kind of trip you want to re-live over and over.
and even though i desperately want to go back again,
i don't ever want to try to recreate what we shared there,
because i feel like it would spoil the magic of it all.

this trip lined up like the stars... just right.
everything was Perfect.
(and i don't tend to throw that word around a lot.)

our location was just right,
the weather cooperated,
we had everything we needed,
and best of all we got to share it with each other.
and that might have been what made the trip as beautiful as it was.
i couldn't have imagined sharing that experience with anyone else.
we were on the same page the whole time.
there was no stress.
no rushing.
no arguing.
we both had things that we wanted to do,
and we wanted to do them with each other.

i'll post more pictures soon,
but here are just a few.
i hope you enjoy them,
because i certainly did.
(and Domo did too. :D)

Monday, September 12, 2011

i can hardly believe it's over...

so, as most of you know, i've been studying for weeks on end.
it's been pretty much non-stop since August 1st.
i've been busting my ass, taking exam after exam,
all in preparation for today.
and now today is over.
and i am done.
i've taken Step 2 and i can finally breathe a sigh of relief.
i won't get my score for several weeks,
but this time i know i tried my best.
i went in as prepared as i could be.
i reviewed as much as i could.
and i showed up... which was the most important part of it all.

it's weird not having anything to do.
(except pack for Maui!!!)
but not having to read or do practice questions is kinda strange.
it's like i'm forgetting something, but i'm not.
because i don't have to do any more practice questions.
and i don't have to read that shitty little Secrets book anymore.
all done.

until the next exam.
which is a couple of years away, thank GOD!

now, i just have to tan, get a mani-pedi, and pack my bags.
after all this hard work, i finally get the prize.
and i get to share it with my fella.
who showed up for me in the best way.
he's incredible and this trip is going to be amazing.
i can't wait!

Monday, September 5, 2011

in case i have forgotten to mention it...

i've never been so in love in all my life.
i get it now... what people have been talking about.

holy hell... it's amazing!

this guy rocks my world on the daily. ♡

Thursday, September 1, 2011

putting myself to the test.

every now and again there comes a time in everyone's life when they are forced to push themselves.
this is one of those times.

i am preparing for yet another Board exam.
these things suck. bad.
it's an all-day affair (8 hours of testing), with limited breaks...
and i am basically being tested on a year's worth of material (if not more).
it is mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausting.

not only am i completely aware of how it will feel (this is the 2nd Board exam i am taking),
but i have been studying for weeks.
and i am reaching an emotional limit.
my world is super small.
it has been condensed down to a pitiful state of crappy-ness.
it currently consists of 8-12 hours a day on my couch in front of my computer.
when i'm not on the laptop, i'm reading facts and memorizing medications, formulas, and equations.
it sucks.
and i wouldn't wish this on anyone.

the last exam didn't go so well... i was kind of a wreck.
i couldn't eat that day because my stomach was turning.
i didn't sleep right the night before because i knew i wasn't ready.
it was one of the worst days of my life.
and i'm not exaggerating.
(i wish i was.)
so mentally preparing myself for this experience is an ordeal.

i feel better this time around, and i know i am working hard.
really really hard.
it's draining.
and i know this is only temporary,
and i can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel,
but that doesn't always help me in moments when i just want to give up and stop.
even though i know i really can't stop.
because i'm not done learning.

so i have to remember that all of this is just a test.
(literally... i am just studying for a test.)
but it's also a test of will. a test of endurance and strength.
a challenge.
and i seem to be facing it.
i feel like i'm doing good work.
i hope i am anyway.
my amazing boyfriend tells me that i am... and i trust him completely so i believe him.
even though i doubt myself all the time.
but knowing that i am the toughest woman he knows is inspiring.
i like being tough.
(because inside i feel like a little squishy thing.)
his faith in me makes me stronger.
i'm so grateful for it.

thank GOD for him.
he amazes me everyday.
and knowing that he believes in me helps me believe in myself when i don't feel like i can.

so now i'm off to bed.
i put in a good day of work.
i'm going to get some good sleep.
i'm gonna wake up, work out, study my ass off, maybe tan a little, and then see my guy...
who i love more than i've ever loved anyone in my whole life.
i'm pretty lucky. :)

good night and thanks for reading.