Thursday, April 14, 2011


surprise... i guess it wasn't too much to ask after all.

i'm totally nervous. and excited. and warm.
and i don't know what is going to happen, and that is totally ok.
but whatever happens... it will definitely be fun.
and we both deserve it.
even though i am kinda freaking out right now.
but even amidst this nervous feeling, i am so giddy it hurts.

and the great thing is that he is available.
and wonderful.
and a really good friend.
and just awesome all the way around.
and he thinks i am awesome too.
he is warm and kind and good.
and just a little dark... in just the right way.
and his eyes are so effing blue.
and his hair is so effing soft.
and the way he hugs me is no joke.
i feel it in my fingertips and in my toes... he means it.

and i kinda can't believe this is happening right now.

i feel like the universe has put him in front of me for a reason.
a good good reason.

the best part of it is that he gets me.
he just gets it... all of it.
and he can keep up. which is a win.

and he makes me laugh.
oh my god his laugh... it's totally infectious and sincere.
i can't help but giggle a whole bunch when i hear it.
i feel pure joy when i hear him laugh out loud.

i knew it might happen when we were sitting next to each other earlier tonight.
my body wanted him...
i had no say in it.
i needed him close to me.
our legs were barely touching and it was totally comfortable.
and i couldn't help but want him closer.

i am so glad he went for it.
my GOD he's cute!
i couldn't make the first move.
the thought of screwing up our friendship was too scary.
but this is a fear worth walking through...
because this is a great thing...
regardless of what it turns out to be.

what an awesome moment!
i love how the wind was blowing all crazy around us.
it made me less aware of myself and more aware of how close we were.
and how he felt on my neck.

i am really happy right now.

and i can't wait until i see him again.
which will be soon.

wow. friday night.
kinda date-y.
i can't wait to hold his hand all secret-style in the movie.
fuck! i'm stoked.

i'm lucky. really really lucky.

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